This can't continue to happen. It's slowly ripping the life out of me.

I need to take an ePoop.

1) There is nothing more satisfying than the rediscovery of lost love. =)

'I really am sorry. I lost you on the pedistal. I'm not too important for you. The smile was in response to me really getting you at that moment. I always felt like you were more than I could ever work up to... like you had some way of understanding the world that I couldn't. It's something that kept me from trying to get closer to you since it started bothering me. There were many times I had wanted you, but got lost in what I believed you thought of me. I questioned your motives every time I spoke to you. I felt guilty about it and it made me drift even further. I think my final crime was believing that the road block was bigger than us. It still isn't. And I'm gone.'

She gets me now. She finally gets me COMPLETELY. Before, she mostly got me. Now, she just completely gets me. I love that.

2) Mom, I hope you're ok, I called a few times and nobody picked up the phone. I hope you're ok. If you're reading this, call me. Shea said you were admitted last night or today? I hope you're well... call me.